


Is That Adorable

by notcleverbutstupid



Category: Monty Python RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2017-06-18
Packaged: 2018-11-15 14:59:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11233401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notcleverbutstupid/pseuds/notcleverbutstupid
Summary: Not true. It is just a story.





	Is That Adorable

In one summer day, the sky was full of clouds, which indicated the coming of rain. It was a common circumstance in Britain in these months, unpredictable and unstable, just like the moods that no one could figure out. 

He held his pen tightly, hearing the sound of pouring gin from the other side of the room. He turned back. It was just the same as what happened yesterday.

Finally, he had no tolerance of it.

He strode through the room, grasped the glass, and tossed it onto the table heavily. Gray, though drunk, still smiled at him like a naughty boy.

“Why… Why do you do this, John? ”

Desperation gripped his breath.

“Drinking will lead you nowhere.”

“How could this happen? ”Gray leaned on the sofa, with two long legs stretching out. His tone couldn’ t be distinguished whether it was a truth or lie, “well, you don’ t have to worry about that. I have been destroyed a long time ago. It has nothing to do with alcohol. ”

“You… You can’ t say that! ”

He almost wanted to hit Gray as long as it could bring his old friend— one of the most talented— to him, he should have done that already, but nothing could change the situation.

It was almost the most important decision he had made in his life after so many nights with insomnia. Those terrible, terrible days reappeared in his mind. Maybe it was ridiculous for anyone who knew him to imagine that he, John Cleese, that arrogant, self- centered bastard hesitated like this. Actually, without this decision, he would drive himself mad sooner or later—

He said, “Old friend, sorry I can’ t continue the third season of Flying Circus. It is my final decision, and you happen to be the first to know.”

Different from what Michael said in interviews many years later, Gray did not show too much insecurity, at least absolutely sober- minded at the moment. His eyes glittered with some feelings that John could not read. And just that moment, Gray stood up, clasped John closely with his arms. John smelt the alcohol around Gray, and it was just like the old days when they were in Cambridge. Those drunken midnights, he and Gray shouted beside the pub, nearly losing consciousness. Oh, beautiful old days.

Gray muttered, “Go, go away, and leave me alone… I know you are not the kind of people who can stay. I felt it in the beginning… Oh, John.”

It should be a hug. He could rub Gray’ s blond hair now, if he would like to, but he didn’ t move. In the rest of his life, they would be friends, but no more than friends. He heard his voice floating in the air dryly:

“How long have we met? ”

“Um, about ten years? Probably more than ten years. I remember when I join Footlights, you are the first to say hello to me, though in a careless way. We will never ever go back to the past… ”

He wanted to say, no, it was not true. 

“… You are young. You are just thirty years old now. You still have a long way to go…”

But he kept silent, for these words were meaningless for Gray.

Without any doubt, he also remembered the scene they met ten years ago. Gray was a vigorous young fellow, intelligent, sharp and creative. Jumping golden spots, cherry on the ice cream, it seemed that every grace adjective can be used to describe Gray. They started their friendship since then.

Suddenly he felt pathetic about his whole life. It became meaningless without Gray. And Gray may think it was him who first ended up this relationship. How ridiculous! Maybe Gray never understanded him fully.

What a bastard.

Then he realized what he should do. He pushed Gray away immediately, and fetched his coat and hat quickly. He had to go, now. 

Gray sat on the sofa, with his hands on knees, which looked like an obedient student. But he spoke in a bitter tone, “Wish you and your wife live happily after. ”

He was so angry that his hands quivered when he spoke. It was such a childish way to retaliate, but still being useful. Do they had to hurt each other like this?

“Wish you and David have a happy life as well. ”

“Oh, David… surprisingly you know him. Well, I am not going to hide this fact from you guys. But… if you are leaving for this reason, oh… you don’ t have to, really. ”

Gray shook his head, “No, it can not be this reason, you are not that silly. ”

He ran out of the room, keeping his mouth shut, so that he would not go back to hug Gray. A man of that height cried out loud in the rain helplessly.

You see, Gray is fond of man, he just doesn’t like you.

17 years later, Gray was dying of cancer; he was also on the spot. David held Gray’ s hand, almost crying to faint. Gray stared at David with his last existing consciousness.

He was not in Gray’ s eyes.

He never was.


End file.
